17. Epilogue!

Clint stood in the corner, waiting. In front of him, Stevie sat happily with his tongue hanging out, looking over the common room. Phil walked in and stopped reading his tablet to look at them.

"Well, that's one of you."

Clint crossed his arms. "Natasha is sparring with Steve."

"I meant the dogs."

"Right." Clint dropped his arms, sighing, and Donut grumbled at him from her sling. "Would you tell him to move?" He pointed at Stevie.

"Only if you promise to stop trying to sneak out of the Tower with Donut." Phil's eyes narrowed.

"How did you—okay, look, she's MY cat! I can take her out if I want! You and Steve take the Cor-mmandos out all the time without us!"

"You know how they feel about this, Clint. You can't relieve them from duty just because you want a triple shot caramel mocha breve latte."

"I don't drink that crap." Clint stood still, trying not to give away any of his tells. Donut mewed, though, and Phil looked at Clint with pity.

"Fine. Fine! Sometimes a guy just needs a lot of sugar and caffeine, okay?"

"What bothers me is that Bucky and Dum Dum are missing," Phil said, ignoring his outburst.

"Don't look at me. I was trying for—I was heading for the elevator when this guy started snapping at my heels." Clint waved at Stevie, who was still looking smug and unmoved in front of him.

"Agent Coulson, I believe your missing companions are on their way now," Jarvis intoned.

"Thank you, Jarvis." Phil turned towards the elevator. The four of them waited for a moment and then Thor landed outside with a loud thud on the Iron Man landing pad, a dog under each arm, held like footballs. Phil spun and moved so fast that Stevie scrambled to catch up, and Clint dove to grab the dog's tail just as the glass doors hissed open for Phil, who looked like he was going to go straight through the glass if they hadn't. Clint executing a theoretically impossible controlled roll down to grab Stevie while not crushing Donut just pissed her off, and she hopped out of the sling and walked over Clint's face on her way to the deluxe, eight foot tall multi-storied cat tower that Tony had built for her near the windows.

"Argh!" Clint yelled, wrestling with Stevie who wanted to charge out onto the platform after Phil.

"Son of Coul!" Thor smiled broadly as he walked in, passing Bucky to Phil's grabby hands as if handing over a beer. "These 'pets' of yours are truly inspiring! A life a leisure, sharing epic poems, eating, sleeping, pissing in the wilds — who would not envy them this?"

Phil stared at Thor, at a complete loss for words as Bucky licked his chin. The glass doors finally hissed closed and Clint let go of Stevie, who bounced over to Thor. He put Dum Dum down, and the dog immediately went and sniffed after Donut's trail to the cat tower. As Clint got up, Thor grabbed Stevie.

"Yes, it is your turn! The wind in your hair, burning your eyes, you will love it, Pet Stevie! Shall we bring the witch?" He held Stevie up in front of him and looked him in the eye.

"NO!" Phil and Clint shouted together.

Thor tucked an uncomplaining Stevie under one arm. "But witches love to fly."

"No!" Clint repeated. "You are not taking my cat for an Asgardian joyride!"

Thor tilted his head, then looked over at Donut. She was at the very top, both of her front paws hanging over the edge of the shelf, looking out at them. They all looked at her and then at each other again.

"No."

"My dear friend, it is not really your choice."

"She's my cat!"

"She is your witch." Thor gave him a look of kind, fond pity. "You are a great warrior, Hawkeye, but in daily matters you are but her familiar. She will put you where she wants you." Thor looked over at Donut, who mah-mah'ed at him. Thor shrugged. "She says she does not wish to upset you, though, as you are delicate and she worries about your state of mind." Thor walked over and slapped his hand down on Clint's shoulder, nearly making his knees buckle. "She will only fly if you are with her, which is clearly right and just, as any witch would not wish to travel far without her familiar nearby. I shall take you both up after I have gifted Pet Stevie with his desire to see Central Park from the sky." He turned to Phil. "You were wrong, pets love to fly."

With that, Thor turned and walked back out onto the landing pad and jumped into the sky, Mjolinir twirling from his free wrist and Stevie barking happily.

Phil was still holding Bucky, looking shell shocked, his mouth open. After a moment he snapped his jaws together. "If he drops my dogs, I will kill him, and no one will be able to stop me." He clutched at Bucky, who squirmed in the too-tight hold.

"He loves those dogs, he won't drop them. Hey, Phil? Phil, hey, put the guy down, you're strangling him." Clint rubbed Phil's arms, and after a few seconds Phil leaned over and gently put Bucky on the ground. The dog immediately ran over and joined Dum Dum on guard duty at the bottom of Donut's tower. Clint pulled Phil into his arms. "Stevie's fine, the boys are fine, Thor's crazy. All is right with the world."

Phil sighed, wrapping his arms around Clint's waist. "I should have guessed you were a witch's familiar. Everything makes so much sense now," Phil said, his voice lilting with a suppressed laugh, pressing his face into Clint's shoulder.

Clint shrugged. "Yeah, actually, it does kind of make sense."

Phil laughed and leaned back enough to kiss him, his mouth warm and affectionate. Clint was fine with whatever they wanted to call him, as long as he could hold on to all the things he had been lucky enough to keep. He kissed back, pushing his body up against Phil's, and enjoying his own version of a joy ride while they waited for Thor to return.