8. Chapter 8

Lou Fei’s head snaps back up and Xiaoman pulls away just a little at Ben’s reaction. They all stare at each other for a long moment before Ben huffs out a breath and rolls his eyes to the ceiling.

“This is awkward,” he says with no small amount of fatalism in his tone.

“Stop this!” Luo Fei slaps a hand against his chest. “Why are you doing this? Why do you keep pulling away from me?” Then he pauses with a frown. “Is it the dress? Is it...too feminine?” The words are as sharp as he usually is, but there is something brittle in the question. He tips his head to look at Ben. “If you do not like the dress, you could just say so! It was no mere folly to doll myself up like this, I don’t—”

“It’s not the dress, Luo Fei,” Ben says softly. “I like this on you. The dress,” he runs a hand up and down Lou Fei’s chest and side, making Luo Fei suck air into his lungs. “And this,” Ben adds, moving his hand back to where he had been playing with garters. He leans down and gives him a kiss that Luo Fei presses into with a whine. Ben gentles his touch, concerned that Luo Fei, even now, might be wary of doing this with another man, even him. Ben is well used to not asking for what he wants and holding himself back for the comfort of others.

He is not prepared for Luo Fei to grab his suit jacket and yank him into a bruising kiss with so much force that Ben topples forward. Xiaoman cries out in surprise as both men tumble onto the floor.

Luo Fei is like a man possessed, though, not caring as knees and elbows knock against each other and the ground. He’s still pulling at Ben’s jacket, hauling him close. Ben’s knees are splayed where he straddles Luo Fei’s thighs, and he sinks down until he feels their erections restrained yet rubbing deliciously together through fabric. Luo Fei’s dress tugs at his own clothes, and Luo Fei is kissing like a demon. Ben is in no state to stop him, either. He’s had fantasies less erotic than this moment. He sinks his hands into Luo Fei’s hair, heedless of pins he’s dislodging as he fondles the curls he sets free.

Luo Fei’s arms are around him and holding on as tightly as he can, holding on for dear life, dragging Ben further down into the passions of this wild and unpredictable man. Luo Fei squirms and gasps for air, almost insentient with desire. It’s surreal and more than Ben ever let himself dream of, to have Luo Fei wrapped in silk and stockings and rubbing against him.

Luo Fei tips his head back to break the kiss, then stares up at him, his eyes bright with excitement and determination.

“I want you, Luo Fei,” Ben says, too desperate for lies. “I want you the way a man does. Please.” He lowers his forehead to rest against Luo Fei’s. They share their breaths, Luo Fei’s stuttering against his cheek.

For a long moment, Ben thinks Luo Fei will say ‘no.’ That it is too far, too soon, too intimate. But he feels Luo Fei nod before he voices his answer. “Yes. Yes, always yours, don’t you understand that already? Yes! Take me already!” Luo Fei fists his hands and taps them against Ben’s chest in a parody of fighting.

“Oh,” Ben says, opening eyes he did not remember closing. He looks up and sees Xiaoman sitting on the settee, watching them with dark eyes, her hand pressing down hard in the vee of her legs.

Yes, he thinks, this is exactly what he wants. Hell, it’s what he came here to the club to get in the first place, for all the shame and embarrassment he knew he would feel afterwards. He’s so glad that Xiaoman chased away the boring human because now, instead, he gets Luo Fei. He refuses to feel anything but happiness about that.

He smiles down at Luo Fei, drifts his lips over his nose, his eyes, before whispering in his ear. “I’m going to fuck you, Xiao Fei, until you cry for me.”

Luo Fei gasps, pulling him into another bruising kiss, all teeth and desperation. Then he yanks his mouth away. “How can you say such scandalous things to me? Have you no shame?”

Ben rolls his eyes at Luo Fei’s utterly typical conflicting demands. “I’ve been fucking men in this club for ten years, Luo Fei, I have no shame left.”

And that, he realizes a heartbeat too late, was a mistake. For all the years he has been fucking men in this club, or in back alleys, or disreputable hotel rooms, he’s never admitted it directly to his best friend. It was all unspeakable acts in the dark, and Ben was resigned to that for life. Luo Fei may have guessed when he went on dates, but did not know that Ben fucked anyone, ever, and it’s obvious in retrospect that he likely assumed Ben just...didn’t.

But now he knows, and he is furious.

His mouth is a firm line, his lips almost white even under the red stain that remains, and his eyes are narrowed and venomous. This is, Ben realizes belatedly, how Luo Fei looks when he’s jealous.

“Luo Fei, you know why, please—”

“How dare you sully your beautiful hands on trash!” His claws are pinching into Ben’s arms, his hands shaking with rage.

Ben is petting him, shaking his head, trying to think of what to say, when he’s yanked off of Luo Fei and tossed aside.